You might have heard Lala Anthony and Kim Kardashian talk about their Bat Chat before. The group chat is their safe place to discuss everything from beauty product recommendations to mom advice, and a safe place to be their most authentic selves. Ahead, Lala Anthony herself takes us inside her group chat and why it’s worth protecting at all costs.
Group chats are a huge part of my life. They’re the majority of the messages on my phone, besides work-related texts. It’s interesting how with both friends and family, there’s always a main group chat and then several sub-group chats. But I feel lucky to be a part of any one I’m in. There’s so much encouragement, advice, and support happening in every one. It’s a resourceful place outside of just talking shit and gossip.
Of all my group chats, the one you might have heard about before is the Bat Chat. It’s the one Kim and I have with a few of our friends, and it’s meant to be a place where super-secure, secret information can be safely shared. We can be our unfiltered, authentic selves. We can share relationship advice, mom advice, health advice, or just shoot the crap. Whatever I’m going through, however I’m feeling, I can talk about it and not be judged.
I know firsthand how important group chats are for women especially. For example, it can be a resource for us to share and discuss our health. It might be as simple as saying, “Hey, make sure you do your yearly exam.” I learned about Prenuvo, a scan that you can do for your whole body, through a group chat. A friend told me, “You should get it done. Make sure you’re healthy all the way through.” There’s the fun stuff too. Someone says, “There’s this new neck cream I’m using that really works. You guys should get it.” And I’m like, “Ordering right now.” Or someone will drop in a photo of a guy and say, “Anybody know him? He’s cute.”
In the Bat Chat, even when we’re far apart, we feel like we’re right next to each other because we’re talking all day long. I check in throughout the day; otherwise I’ll get too behind. You want reactions in real time. We’re talking about timely stuff here. Who wants their friend to react three hours later? The moment has passed! But we all have that one person. We make a joke about it in mine. She’ll say, “Sorry, I know I’m always behind.” And we’re like, “Girl, that was three days ago. Nobody’s even talking about that anymore. Where have you been?” But everyone gets it.
In a group chat with your closest friends, I don’t think there should be any etiquette or rules. It should be the one place you can say anything unfiltered. You have to tailor your responses in a work group chat, or with some family members. But with girlfriends? Anything goes. Part of that is because, with social media, there’s still a level of filter, figuratively and literally. Our pictures are filtered. Even people who try to be their authentic selves on social media, sharing things about their lives, still have some kind of a guard up. I think that’s why group chats have replaced social media, in a way. It’s the real unfiltered place where we can be ourselves on our happiest and our ugliest days. On Instagram, so many people you don’t know are looking and judging and saying things. You want somewhere you can be yourself.
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