In 2022, a good pair of stylish headphones should do a lot more than message your eardrums with Lil Yachty’s gentle warble. They should be an outfit-making accessory in their own right, an extension of your finely-honed personal style that telegraphs to your fellow commuters what, exactly, you’re all about. Like a choice piece of statement jewelry or a buzzy, must-have it bag, the right pair of status cans will make everything you’re wearing look exponentially cooler. (Unlike a kooky necklace or a bedazzled clutch, though, they’ll also help you focus when you’ve got a deadline to meet and the neighbor’s toddler just woke up from a nap.)
But if you thought the world of men’s clothing was jargon-laden and inexplicably judgmental, just get your audiophile pals started on frequency responses and codec speeds and then watch their synapses implode trying to explain dBr. Aesthetics matter, they’ll be the first to remind you, but so does audio quality. (Duh.) So unless you’re willing to drop a couple grand on a rotation of headphones for every occasion, your money might be better spent on a single, high-performing pair that happens to double as a rad, goes-with-everything accessory.
Luckily for you, your pals at GQ Recommends called up a few of the most discerning audio buffs in our rolodex to get the low-down on the status cans that’ll sync up best with your personal style. Maybe you’re looking to snag the snootiest fella in your life a gift they’ll actually enjoy unwrapping this year. Maybe you’re fed up with your dinged AirPods cutting out halfway through your afternoon Zooms. No matter the reason (and no matter what you’re listening to), there’s a pair of stylish headphones with your name on it. Trust us: that backlog of Corporate Lunch episodes you’re still catching up on will never sound more crisp—and your wardrobe will never look more uniquely yours.
The Final Boss of Influencer Headphones
New AirPods tend to be received with a shrug of the inevitable; you know you’re going to buy them anyway, so why bother poring over the specs? The OG version, the 2nd Gen, the AirPods Pro—Apple’s flagship earbuds have always been the pair to get. Chalk it up to the brand’s particularly fanatic acolytes, but the same holds true for the AirPods Max, Apple’s inaugural foray into the world of premium over-ear cans. Assuming you’re already plugged into the Apple ecosystem, the user experience is second to none, the audio quality is top-notch, and the design is pure Apple all the way through. “I wouldn’t consider the AirPods Max to be the most practical [option]”, notes Marcus Allen, a stylist and founder of The Society Archive. “But what sold me on them was a Zoom call with Leo Reilly. He looked cool-as-hell in them.” Does most of their appeal boil down to cool people you’ve seen online looking cool-as-hell wearing them? Maybe. But how many other gadgets are equally likely to wind up on the wishlist of your older cousin, who dispenses dubious investment advice on TikTok, and his snot-nosed kid brother, who flaunts his newest sneakers with the same shameless gusto?
The Lawful Good Headphones
So you want headphones that look good and sound great, without any slick marketing hoopla inflating their price. In other words, you want Sony’s WH-1000XM4, an ol’ reliable option your Pops might read about in Consumer Reports—and Timothée Chalamet wears on the regular. Yes, Sony’s current flagship is actually the WH-1000XM5. But take a gander through your timeline and you’ll see more earnest fashion-y types sticking by the previous model. Maybe it’s because they’re $50 cheaper. Maybe it’s because they look less like an AirPod Max knockoff than the current version. Whatever the reason, they’ve got the audio chops to make those Charlie Parker riffs really pop—and serve as a perfect complement to closet stuffed with quiet, sensible threads. The WH-1000XM4 is nearly as good as the XM5, and for the price, it’s sort of a wash anyway. You’re not going to impress your subway mates with your ingenuity, but a safe bet isn’t always the wrong one. (Just ask the heap of 501s on your floor.)
The Headphones for Anti-Apple Design Heads
With its sleek metal exterior and clean, featureless design, you’d be forgiven for mistaking the Mu7 for a distant relative of the AirPods Max. “I love the look of them,” says Derrick Gee, a DJ and audio buff who regularly discusses headphones with his followers on TikTok. “Intentionally or not, they fit into the 2000s cyber comeback/liquid metal aesthetic going around right now.” Gee also points to their rounded, vaguely humanoid silhouette, a detail he attributes to designer Ross Lovegrove’s knack for pulling eye-grabbing shapes from the natural world. In addition to its distinct look, though, the Mu7 boasts KEF’s signature immersive sound, and lets you connect 3.5mm headphone cables so you can plug in to your DAC of choice. Somewhere in Cupertino, an Apple product team is quaking—and the JJJJound-branded sneakers in your front hallway just whooped with delight.
The Wired It Girl Headphones
If you’re rocking wired headphones in the year of our Lord 2022, you’ve either misplaced a single AirPod and given up looking for it, or are leaning hard into the Wired It Girl aesthetic and aren’t too pressed about audio quality. Given how much of a ruckus Apple’s Ear Pods made when they debuted (no, really—that’s what they were called), it’s fitting that the brand’s wired headphones are leading our ironic return to a corded alternate reality. The legendary white colorway, the silicone-wrapped wire that, ahem, patinas over time—all of it amounts to a fascination with the retro not unlike the one that catalyzed the vinyl resurgence before it. If you dig listening to music that sounds like it’s being pumped through an aquarium tank—and have a hankering for oversized, Y2k-indebted vintage gems—these are the buds for you.
The Nostalgic Gen-Zer Headphones
If Koss’ Porta Pro headphones look like they sauntered off the set of an ‘80s sci-fi flick it’s because, well, they kind of did. First introduced in 1984, they’ve crept back into the spotlight thanks to their retro design, affordable price tag, and, naturally, a crucial Emma Chamberlain cosign. But don’t let the dusty tech fool you—these suckers have been a favorite of audiophiles for decades, thanks to their clear highs, full base, and overall clarity. Gee has cycled through five pairs of the Porta Pro, describing them as “arguably one of the better-sounding headphones on this list due to their open-backed design.” (Buying them, he adds, should be a rite of passage for any music fan.) These days, Koss makes updated versions that include in-line microphones and swappable cords compatible with USB-C and Lightning ports—there’s even a wireless option. But why on Earth would you want any of those highfalutin add-ons when the OG silhouette packs this much charm, and will look way more authentic with your era-appropriate Armani tailoring?
The Headphones for People Who Don’t Want to Think About Their Headphones
You’ve probably heard of Bose, and you know that its headphones aren’t cheap, so you figure they’re halfway decent. (That’s brand awareness, baby!) And you’re not wrong—not really, at least. All that name recognition isn’t entirely fluff; the experts we spoke to were quick to recommend other options, but even the most curmudgeonly of the bunch had little in the way of bad things to say about the brand’s signature Quiet Comfort headphones. They offer some of the best noise-cancelation on the market, and though the design skews bulky compared to their sleeker counterparts, that heft feels comfortingly analog, especially if you’ve got a healthy appreciation for the classics. Look, no one’s going to call you a luddite if you show up with these wrapped around your neck—all we’re saying is that they might look better with a uniform of Barbour jackets and pleated chinos than boxy hoodies and ginormous jeans.
The “We Get It—You Have a Podcast” Headphones
Although the legacy of the Sony MDR-7506 doesn’t extend quite as far back as the Koss Porta Pro, the former might be the more classic option. Introduced in the early ‘90s, the MDR-7506 has been a studio mainstay for decades, not-so-quietly amassing an ardent amateur audiophile following in the process. Chances are, your favorite ‘90s album was recorded with its help. And chances are, any person who’s wearing a pair today won’t let you forget it…and will probably ask you to break down your fit in granular detail—yooo, are those the Camions?!—the next time you see them.
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